What Is the First Thing Remarkably Successful People Do? Figure Out Which Game They’re Actually Playing Then you can determine how to win the game you not only want to play, but need to play. (source](https://www.inc.com/jeff-haden/what-is-the-first-thing-remarkably-successful-people-do-figure-out-which-game-theyre-actually-playing/91018932)
I read the article from Jeff Haden and found it resonating. Then, I realized how often in life I had no idea what game I was supposed to be playing…so I didn’t.
But we are social creatures, and to survive, we must play some game get along or ahead.
Haden cites a philosopher, Kwame Anthony Appiah:
“In life the challenge is not so much to figure out how best to play the game; the challenge is to figure out what game you’re playing.”
Haden never reveals how to figure that out. Let’s take a stab at it…or let AI do the heavy lifting.
Games People Play and How To Win
| Game Type | Clever Name | Rules to Win | Additional Actions |
|---|---|---|---|
| Social Status | King of the Hill | - Always be seen and heard. - Help others succeed to build alliances. - Stay informed about group dynamics and gossip. |
- Volunteer for leadership roles. - Dress and present yourself in a way that reflects your status. |
| Relationship Building | The Trust Fall | - Be authentic and vulnerable. - Prioritize quality time over quantity. - Communicate openly and honestly. |
- Regularly express appreciation for those you care about. - Understand and respect boundaries and differences. |
| Resource Acquisition | The Gold Rush | - Identify and pursue valuable opportunities. - Invest in yourself and your skills. - Network to uncover hidden resources. |
- Maintain a financial plan and stick to it. - Continuously educate yourself to increase your value. |
| Market Competition | Game of Monopoly | - Understand your competitors and their strategies. - Differentiate your offerings effectively. - Be adaptable to market changes. |
- Regularly analyze market trends and consumer behavior. - Use innovation to stay ahead of competitors. |
| Skill Mastery | The Mastery Quest | - Set clear goals for your skill level. - Practice consistently and seek feedback. - Learn from masters in your field. |
- Break down your goals into manageable tasks. - Integrate your learning with real-world applications. |
| Identity Formation | The Shape Shifter | - Reflect regularly on your values and beliefs. - Embrace new experiences for growth. - Be flexible in evolving your identity. |
- Seek feedback on your identity and behaviors. - Engage in activities that challenge your current self-concept. |
| Political Influence | The Chessmaster | - Strategize carefully and think several steps ahead. - Build coalitions and alliances. - Know when to push and when to retreat. |
- Use diplomacy to navigate conflicts. - Continuously assess the power dynamics around you. |
| Control and Autonomy | The Freedom Fighter | - Assert your boundaries confidently. - Seek independence in your choices. - Balance cooperation with self-interest. |
- Practice saying no without guilt. - Establish and defend your personal space and time. |